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Kids say the wrongest things
It's amazing how vulnerable a grown adult can be made to feel. The other day we were ALL visiting a friend, a female friend, for dinner. Afterwards my kids were terrorizing her cat, searching the bottom of a gallon of milk for the free toy, and checking to see how many of her expensive pieces of art would interlock. I must admit it looked a lot like a transformer when they were done.
The woman and I were discussing the newest novel I'm working on and the conversation drifted. She made a comment about how much bigger her hips look when she wears a dress. My eleven year old looked at her and said, "Maybe it's not the dress."
Not that men are even slightly interested in such things, but my friend is quite skinny. However, it's true, she looks a lot different, depending on what she wears. Of course, after she reads this, I won't be invited to any more dinners. That's okay, though. I've grown rather fond of my crappy cooking.
People often tell me I look thin for my age. That is because I don't serve palatable food. In fact, I enjoy things that come from a box. Sometimes I even cook the box. But even that is not a problem. Sometimes I prefer to eat the box.
Oddly, my children seem more cooperative at the table when I cook from a box. They LOVE artificial food. When I make 'homemade' macaroni and cheese my kids say things like, "I think this is spoiled." It does NOT, after all, taste anything like what comes from a box.  What a terrible thing for me to serve them. What was I thinking?
Now if only someone would invent green vegetables from a box.
Al Musitano
Submitted by DadofManatee on Dec. 3, 2008, 7:42 pm
It's amazing how vulnerable a grown adult can be made to feel. The other day we were ALL visiting a friend, a female friend, for dinner. Afterwards my kids were terrorizing her cat, searching the bottom of a gallon of milk for the free toy, and checking to see how many of her expensive pieces of art would interlock. I must admit it looked a lot like a transformer when they were done.
The woman and I were discussing the newest novel I'm working on and the conversation drifted. She made a comment about how much bigger her hips look when she wears a dress. My eleven year old looked at her and said, "Maybe it's not the dress."
Not that men are even slightly interested in such things, but my friend is quite skinny. However, it's true, she looks a lot different, depending on what she wears. Of course, after she reads this, I won't be invited to any more dinners. That's okay, though. I've grown rather fond of my crappy cooking.
People often tell me I look thin for my age. That is because I don't serve palatable food. In fact, I enjoy things that come from a box. Sometimes I even cook the box. But even that is not a problem. Sometimes I prefer to eat the box.
Oddly, my children seem more cooperative at the table when I cook from a box. They LOVE artificial food. When I make 'homemade' macaroni and cheese my kids say things like, "I think this is spoiled." It does NOT, after all, taste anything like what comes from a box.  What a terrible thing for me to serve them. What was I thinking?
Now if only someone would invent green vegetables from a box.
Al Musitano
Comments
They do come in a can- thank goodness for that!!!
There's one particular reason I like boxes over cans. I don't get so confused trying to open a box. But I'll keep your advice in mind...just in case.
Al